Whether you experience chronic anxiety, panic attacks, or a sudden rush of high stress, it’s important to restore your calm quickly when your heart starts racing. These moments can arise suddenly in work or social situations, and most stressors in these situations are not actual threats of harm.
Note: If you are in actual danger, remove yourself from the situation as quickly as possible and seek help. It’s always important to discern mere stressors from legitimate threats of harm.
This practice will help you regain calm, discern the nature of the stressor, and retake control of your nervous system.
Discern Stressor vs. Threat
Take a moment to assess whether you’re responding to a stressor—such as a difficult conversation, a mistake at work, a social embarrassment—or an actual threat from a dangerous person or unsafe environment. Humans are evolved to respond automatically to situations where our physical safety is at risk, such as violence, harassment, or environmental danger, which is an important survival mechanism.
Unfortunately, our modern world presents an endless array of common challenges that, while uncomfortable, are not life-threatening, and still produce the same physiological responses as if we suddenly spotted a lion stalking us on a trail. It’s important to restore calm and neutralize these physiological responses when we are not in actual danger, because they affect our capacity for rational thought and prolonged periods of heightened physiological stress response can have negative effects on our health.
Ground Yourself
When stress or anxiety arises, your body reacts immediately. You might feel your heart race, your breath quicken, or a tightening in your muscles. These are signs of activation in your nervous system. To maintain or regain calm quickly, try these two
Pause and Anchor: Plant your feet firmly on the ground and sit upright if possible. Feel the support of the surface beneath you. If standing, distribute your weight evenly.
Box Breathing: Inhale deeply through your nose for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, then exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of 6. Repeat this cycle three times to activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which helps to restore physiological calm.
Name the Feeling
Acknowledge what you’re experiencing without judgment. Naming your feelings (“I’m feeling overwhelmed,” “I’m feeling afraid”) can reduce their intensity by bringing them into conscious awareness. Make a mental note of the situation that triggered the feeling.
Engage Your Senses
If the stressor is not a threat, use your senses to bring yourself into the present moment and reduce overthinking:
5-4-3-2-1 Technique:
Consciously take in your environment and focus your observations on your immediate senses.
- 5 things you can see,
- 4 things you can touch,
- 3 things you can hear,
- 2 things you can smell,
- 1 thing you can taste.
This simple exercise helps shift your focus from what’s overwhelming you to what’s grounding you.
Reorient to Action
Once you have restored a sense of calm, reflect on what action, if any, the situation requires. Ask yourself mentally:
“What is within my control?”
“What is my next best step?”
Respond, Don’t React: Decide on a thoughtful course of action instead of reacting impulsively.
Release Residual Stress
After the situation has passed, take a moment to reset your body and mind fully.
- Stretch or Walk: If possible, move your body gently to release tension.
- Express Emotion: If safe, talk to someone you trust about how you felt and what you did. Sharing can help release lingering stress.
